Why Integrity Matters and how the Indianapolis Motor Speedway Corporation lost it

Integrity is an principle of character found upon elements including honesty, fortitude, dependability, and the equitable treatment of similarly situated people. Integrity is a demonstration of morality.

Nearly half of us were raised by parents lacking necessary integrity for us to form a secure attachment. These parents may have ignored our pleas for aid choosing to instead respond at their convenience. Others may have been less harmful but still harmful in administering physical abuse. Whatever the method employed to inhibit the establishment of a secure attachment these parents failed to demonstrate integrity. That is, they did not project to our infant selves that they would be dependable, that we were treated fairly, that we were of primary importance, and that they possessed the qualities necessary to fulfill their decision to be and undertaking as a parent.

As adults all of us look for integrity in the persons with whom we have relationships; be they personal or business. Likewise others are looking for that quality in each of us. When engaging in a reciprocal bond we do so upon trust. That trust is violated when an action lacking in integrity is neither acknowledged or corrected.

For parents it is critical that they demonstrate integrity to their children. This is more fundamental to providing a child of parents in conflict with the security that his or her needs will be met during the time of great flux. Honesty with the child, consistency, and fair treatment help to meet this need. Your bad day at work is not justification for ignoring your child, administering arbitrary punishments, or lying about the basis for not meeting a child’s wants or needs. As I imbue in my clients there is only one valid excuse: I failed to make that a priority.

Integrity is not differentiated in the business spectrum. Regardless of what is happening personally your customers, clients, guest, visitors, or however the other party in your relationship is titled he or she must be treated with respect backed by integrity. It is ultimately the responsibility of management at the highest level to ensure that everyone throughout the personnel echelon adheres to principles of integrity.

The incident at the Indianapolis Motor Speedway, which I wrote about in 2011 Indianapolis Motor Speedway - Indy 500, demonstrated the lack of integrity of the track personnel from the President down. The incident of being treated with such disrespect was the defeasance to our contract. That contract was terminated at my request to do so if the administration felt that they would be unable to compel their employees to be dignified in their treatment of me. After some phones calls at the administration office the contract was terminated.

I followed-up with an email to the president of the IMS Corp who refused to acknowledge my complaint sent to him. This further exudes his dereliction in personnel matters. The disputatious basis for rudely telling me to “just get out!” is irrelevant to the matter of the disrespect shown to anyone who is a guest of a business facility. Even if the employee had not been incorrect about her made-up-on-the-spot policy no visitor to a facility should be shouted at by an employee and told to leave upon challenging the employee to substantiate the so-called policy.

Collectively as stewards of our society we must demonstrate integrity for our children. This requires severing ties to those who lack integrity and harm children in the process. When a clerk at Wal-Mart say the clearance price on a toy my son had chosen she called over the store manager. The manager asked if there were anymore. When I responded no she took the toy from my son and said “This is not for sale” leaving my son sitting in the cart crying. Respect for my son, my character, and my duty as a steward of the society upon which my son would evolve required that I never make a financial contribution to Wal-Mart again. Regretfully I was in a jam once and made a late night purchase there in the past 15 years. But I have since made it a priority to never again be in the position of needing to patronize Wal-Mart. The love of my son requires it. He knows that I have integrity because I acted in accordance with a parent who possesses integrity.

Parents who punish their children through the arbitrary denial of parenting time or who, based upon their own feelings or circumstances, condition their dedication to their children are lacking in integrity. The children are acutely aware of the parental lack of integrity and respond accordingly, usually in a manner that the parent would label as a behavioural problem. They are behavioural problems but not on the part of the children. While these direct actions by a parent demonstrate a lack of integrity so does the failure to appropriately respond to acts adverse to the child. If I had not responded to Wal-Mart’s illegal, unethical and immoral business practice then I would have demonstrated to my son that I lack integrity and cannot protect him or meet his needs which is something a child of age two desperately requires.

The Indianapolis 500 as an event and the Indianapolis Motor Speedway as a business entity lack integrity. People who lack integrity are, collectively, harmful to children and as such I am still morally bound to avoid providing any support to those who lack integrity and thus harm children. As I seek to adhere to the moral absolute I will not allow myself to contribute to the harm of children for my personal enjoyment. I enjoyed spending 15-20 days a year at the IMS but that cannot come upon the harm to children. Hence, I will never purchase a diamond and, as I said previously, if you ever see me at the Indianapolis Motor Speedway feel free to run up and kick me in the balls to remind me that I need to affirm my integrity.

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Parents who would like to achieve the best outcome for their children in a contested child custody case should visit my website and contact my scheduler to make an appointment to meet with me. Attorneys may request a free consultation to learn how I can maximize their advocacy for their clients.

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©2008, 2015 Stuart Showalter, LLC. Permission is granted to all non-commercial entities to reproduce this article in it's entirety with credit given.

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The 5 Hour Energy SCAM and getting to Truth that benefit parent-child relationships and custody litigation

Today it is not my intention to keep you from getting ripped off by another unscrupulous corporation selling a magical elixir. That could be an added side benefit though. Rather, it is my purpose here to induce you to question the claims you hear, especially those which seem plausible. In doing this you should enhance your parent-child relationship and improve your outcome in child custody litigation.

Some deceptions are so readily accepted because of the ostensible claims obscuring the lie. Who would believe someone standing in an agora during the lunch hour proclaiming it to be midnight? If we are so fortunate enough as a society to have a populace sufficiently informed about the solar diurnal cycle and the associated timetable then it would be no one. But what if it is something for which the general population is not knowledgable? For instance, the biological processes involved in converting calories into energy for the human body. There are some people who believe that metabolism determines BMI although it is logically impossible and such claims have been resoundingly refuted by the medical community. It is this ignorance and misconceptions that foster the subreption upon which the crooks selling “5 Hour Energy” rely and which impede the emotional development of children.

Calories in food and beverages are combined with oxygen to release the energy your body needs to function. Thus, energy is merely the conversion of calories. For the body to expend energy it needs to take in calories otherwise it will consume body tissue to satisfy those needs. The body stores excess energy in the form of fat cells. The average person applies the majority of his or her caloric intake to the basal metabolic rate. That is the energy needed for thermo-regulation, cell repair and regeneration, adjusting hormone levels, as well as respiratory and circulatory functioning. Additional calorie burn takes place in conversion loss which is the digestive process.

To maximize energy a diet should consist primarily of simple carbohydrates. Foods should be cooked or pureed to assist in the digestive process. Although exercise and movement is the most variable element of calorie consumption it is not to be avoided. In addition to digestive assistance, calorie demand can be reduced by dressing so you do not chill and shedding unnecessary weight. The bodies of people who are larger burn more calories, even at rest. We know this intuitively when we carry a backpack or bookbag loaded down and feel the additional strain upon our muscular system which has to increase its energy consumption to move the load.

If you count on 5-Hour Energy drinks to provide you with your energy needs your are going to need deep pockets. Dietary supplement manufacturers aren't required by the Food and Drug Administration to prove that their products are safe or effective. Thus, Living Essentials, LLC -- the distributor of “5-Hour Energy” -- can, as they do, lie with impunity about their “dietary supplement.” This product would be more appropriately named 5-Minute Energy. That is because it provides enough energy for an average person to maintain a waking state of rest for five minutes.

To get the calories needed to maintain a typical human body for a 24 hour period one would need to consume about 6 gallons of “5-Hour Energy”. By comparison one could get the necessary calories by consuming four servings of rice and four servings of black beans. Although neither provides sufficient essential nutrients the rice and beans combined include protein, dietary fiber and some minerals while “5-Hour energy” contains only carbohydrates, added B vitamins and about 80 times the recommended daily allowance of sodium. The cost for the rice and beans is about $1. The cost of getting the energy equivalent from “5-Hour Energy” is . . . a staggering $800 when purchased in bulk. That is over $250,000 per year.

Always view factual claims with caution and skepticism. Keep in mind that it was once a “fact” that the earth was flat. However, through the application of reason and logic such an absurdity was refuted. As the use of reason and logic continue to gain acceptance and long held ‘truths’ are discarded the charlatans who perpetuate falsehoods will be exposed as not credible. You don’t want your child to be the one who views you as not credible. Name the person who went cross-eyed from sitting too close to the television. You can’t because it never happened. There are many parents out there who lost credibility over that and similar issues. Likewise children come to learn truths about Santa Claus and other mystical tools of manipulation.

My son is secure in knowing that there is one person in this world upon whom he can depend without question or hesitation. That is the person who told him at age three years that there was no Santa Claus, that it was all a big lie, that regardless of the ubiquity of the falsehood it remained just that - a lie. Over the years one person kept repeating Truth to him and as he grew old others stopped acquiescing the lie. I was that stalwart from the first day. I am the person in whom he seeks counsel, reassurance, and security because I demonstrated integrity to him. Yet because of the ubiquity of some falsehoods and credulity of those who profess honesty even they will still perpetuate falsehoods such as the Declaration of Independence was signed on 04 July 1776.

Integral to the healthy development of a child is that he or she has a patient, dependable, and honest parent. I am not saying that a child custody decision will hinge upon which parent takes the stand and proudly proclaims “I told the children there is no Santa Claus.” Rather, it is the demonstration that a parent’s actions are child centered. The strong rebuke that drug abusing parents receive in court is not because of the drug use. Courts have often imposed orders and admonished parents that they can get all messed up if they wish, unless the children are under their care and control. This is not based upon lack of legal authority. Nor is this because of what may appear to be the self-evident need for a parent to be in control of his or her mental faculties when supervising children. The need for parents to be cognizant and sober around children is so that the children are assured that they have a dependable person available to facilitate their needs. When children fear that a parent will leave, be jailed, hospitalized, or die they suffer mental and physical ailments across the anxiety spectrum. There is a misconception that the prevalence of childhood anxiety is the result of pressure to succeed. The reality is that it is based upon the fear of abandonment. That one parent may already be gone and the other may leave or be taken away. Additionally, there is the fear of not fulfilling a parents’ concept of success and that the parent will emotionally abandon a child with less-than-acceptable performance levels. If you have ever seen a child athlete vomit preceding a competition then you have been exposed to this performance anxiety which is most often founded upon the expectations of a parent.

Examine your actions from a child centered perspective. Does using “5 Hour Energy” demonstrate integrity? Absolutely not. Rather it demonstrates credulity and more precisely a lack of intelligence because the energy level of about five minutes is clearly indicated on the label. How can a child be assured that a parent who can’t do something as simple as read the calorie content of a “food” label will provide housing, food, proper guidance, and stability? If your actions are consistent with integrity and fostering trust your parent-child relationship, along with the emotional health of your children, will benefit.

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Make a suggestion for me to write about.

Parents who would like to achieve the best outcome for their children in a contested child custody case should visit my website and contact my scheduler to make an appointment to meet with me. Attorneys may request a free consultation to learn how I can maximize their advocacy for their clients.

Connect with me for the latest Indiana child custody related policy considerations, findings, court rulings and discussions.

Tweet

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* indicates required

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First Name

Last Name

©2008, 2015 Stuart Showalter, LLC. Permission is granted to all non-commercial entities to reproduce this article in it's entirety with credit given.

StuartShowalter.com